2nd post

just over 1 year and 11 months I posted a story about my first speeding ticket... well a similar situation went down this afternoon just lamer... UGHHH wtf, when I think about it I'm "grateful" I didn't get some bad ticket like hardcore speeding (which I do) but getting a ticket for some pathetic reason like crossing the solid line while merging onto the freeway cause there's a slow truck in front of you... FUCK you mr "copper" I mean yeah your doing your job but serious how lame is that... UGH like I said. I'm gonna stop thinking about it now.

I was gonna post my thoughts on the suicide issue because I realize whatever it is I put up last night wasn't very obvious... so that will wait, I'm going to sleep.

gay suicide pt 2

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

WOW,

where to start... from my second to last post talking about a kid at the U that committed suicide has come some interesting aftermath, part of what I write on here is just to archive some information for myself. the other reason I bring this up is because recent posts by Even and Michael about suicide...

As far as I can tell there was an outcry from friends and family because of the "disrespect" that was taken from the article and it seems like to me the comments were disabled on the article, thanks to google cached memory (or whatever you call what google does) these are the comments that were said... (***found at the end of this post*** I didn't read them all but I want them here if I ever do want to read them... from what I read I was kinda ticked at what I read...)

so then I wrote the editor and then I wrote the chick that wrote the article... (responses if any will follow when I get them)

it sounds like you got some grief from this...? whats going on am I right when I say the comments were disabled? thanks for bringing something I feel as important to my attention otherwise I never would of known... please let me know what went on here...?

right on, your form to submit letters isn't working so I hope this will get where it needs to go to bring up in my mind a valid argument to something that seems it being covered up...

WOW, I'm sure the controversy that came from the article on Nick Judge (who committed suicide Oct 2nd) has gone un-noticed to most people, I think you (the chrony) even disabled all the comments on the article. Thanks to google cached memory I could view a small portion of the argument that ensued. I think the article was very pertinent to students and I am glad it was brought to my attention.

this was my comment if I could of published it... According to an article in the Deseret Morning News of April 23, 2006, Utah leads the nation in suicides of men age 15-24. IS this a problem? I think it is, and it needs to be addressed no matter how hard or difficult it is to talk about. WAS it because of a hard class? who knows, but don't ignore the facts, I'm sorry for everyone that is offended by this but at least the truth was told.

obit from des news

Nick Judge 1989 ~ 2009 Nick Judge passed away in the home he loved. He was in pain in a way his family and friends did not know or understand. He left this world on October 2nd, 2009. Nick was a beloved son, brother, friend and uncle. He graduated from Highland High School with high honors. He was in his third year at the University of Utah, majoring in Mechanical Engineering. He was the most inventive and creative builder and designer many have ever known. He was a constant source of fun and entertainment. Nick also loved tutoring high school students at Highland High. He loved music, snowboarding, riding his bullet bike, camping, backpacking, and watching planes with his father. He was preceded in death by his grandmother, Norma Dalton; aunt, Joan Garrison; uncle, Jerry Judge; and brother, Christopher Fieseler. He is survived by his father, Peter Judge; mother, Darlene Judge; siblings, Cyndi Wheatley, Jason Fieseler, Bonnie Judge, and Jeremy Judge. Nick was the loving uncle to Breylyn Esch and Isaiah Wheatley; and best friend to Easton Cook. We know Nick will be missed by all who knew him. Our family's deepest gratitude is extended to all friends who have expressed sympathy and support. "No man hath greater love than one who lays down his life for the sake of others." Friends and family are invited to join us for a Memorial Service on Friday, October 9th, 2009 at 4:30 p.m. at the Christ Lutheran Church located at 240 East 5600 South.

comments from the "chrony"

Comments

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12

Your name

Sun Oct 11 2009 16:55

This it the worst article I have ever read. Not only is it offensive to the family and to the memory of Nick, but it is poorly written. This article should be pulled and Rita Totten should only be allowed to write on toilet paper which I will then use to wipe my ass. Respect.

CJH

Sun Oct 11 2009 10:17

Unfortunately, there is nothing that can really be done in this situation. The words have been thoughtlessly printed, the irrevocable damage done. Those of us who know the Judges and who knew Nick will always hold a very private, very special place in our hearts for them... To accept what has happened and move forward in his honor, bringing to life his memory from time to time, and remembering what joy and happiness he brought to each of us - that's what we need to do in honoring this extraordinatry young man's life and memory. It really is unfortunate that the writer didn't know Nick - the article would have indeed been more reflective of the man we knew and loved...her loss.

Your name

Sun Oct 11 2009 00:26

RB- I personally don't think that anyone should be trying to make an excuse for Ms Totten's poor excuse for an article, and for making it seem as though she interviewed a family that she REALLY DID NOT EVEN INTERVIEW (this is a fact, people. A hardcore fact!). She DID NOT interview this family. The family did not give their permission for such information to be reported; and as a student paper, the "how" of a suicide should not have found it's way into the Chronicle. Shame on the writter and shame on the person who let Ms. Totten run this article. SHAME ON YOUR CHRONICLE! SHAME ON YOU MS. TOTTEN FOR REPORTING INFORMATION THAT WAS NOT YOUR RIGHT TO REPORT. YOU HAVE GENUINELY UPSET THIS FAMILY IN MORE WAYS THAT YOU CAN IMAGINE. THEY DID NOT GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO RUN SUCH INFORMATION! SHAME ON YOU!

Your name

Sun Oct 11 2009 00:19

The Judge family did not even know that they were being interviewed. So yes, I do believe that Ms. Totten acted out of selfishness and with disrespect for the family.

Hilda

Fri Oct 9 2009 16:55

This article was not only written by a 2 year old but worst of all...so disrespectful!! You absolutely had no permission to report this..this conversation was between two friends which one of them decided to take it upon herself and run with it!! Rita Totten Rotten should know better then to invade a family's tragedy!! NO EXCUSE!!

RB Scott

Fri Oct 9 2009 14:03

I know neither the Judge family nor the reporter Rita Totten. Nor do I know the arrangements and agreements the family made before talking to a reporter about Nick Judge's death. I/we can only guess. It's pretty unlikely that Ms. Totten acted maliciously and it's obvious that the Judges were quite cooperative. The challenge then becomes: where to draw the line. One man's "compelling story" is another's "invasion of privacy." Could the story be better? Absolutely. The pieces Ms. Totten produces tomorrow and the next day will be better than the one she wrote yesterday. I note also that newspapers and magazines have written explicitly about the horrors Elizabeth Smart endured as a captive. All of us feel for her like we do the Judges. Silence serves no useful purpose that I can see.

Boston, MA.

Annie

Fri Oct 9 2009 12:11

Judge Family and Friends - as a fellow classmate and someone who knew Nick, I apologize for this story and the additional pain I'm sure it's caused you during this time.

Becca

Fri Oct 9 2009 12:01

A matter of public record, correct. But when a family 'invites' you into their lives during such a tragic time, asking you to perhaps help by sharing in some of their story so that a similar situation might be prevented, you would think that you'd be honored to share in their moment of grief and respect both the deceased and his survivors. Looks like insensitive and bad reporting judgement on the part of the Chronicle.

Jack

Fri Oct 9 2009 11:53

"Curious" - maybe friends of Nick just want the author of this story to feel a slightly similar 'pain' that the family felt when they first read the article? Insensitive to the author? I think not...

"RB" - given this situation, does the 'how' really even matter - I think that's what the issue is here...

Cheryl

Fri Oct 9 2009 11:46

RB - your paragraph, "Although it is unclear, it appears that members of the Judge family wanted the story of their son’s/brother’ssuicide told. Perhaps they hoped the telling would prevent others – young people temporarily overwhelmed by one class or another, personal disappointments and setbacks – from contemplating such dramatic and irreversible non-solutions. If this is the case, the Judge family acted commendably." hits the nail on the head! That is what their desire was/is...how it got to the story which has been published it unclear...

Curious

Fri Oct 9 2009 10:16

I repeat my question: Cut the sentence below?

RB Scott

Fri Oct 9 2009 10:16

First, a few words about standards and practices from an aging journalist (and father of college age children) on the East Coast who got his start writing and editing for The Chrony:

--Anything on the public record – births, deaths, arrests, and marriages – may be published. Newspapers of public record routinely choose to limit their reports on suicides to the bare essentials. On occasion – usually with encouragement from surviving family members – reports are more detailed.

-- Despite some letter writers’ claims to the contrary, journalists are trained to report the who, when, what, where and why of the story, as well as the “how.”

Although it is unclear, it appears that members of the Judge family wanted the story of their son’s/brother’ssuicide told. Perhaps they hoped the telling would prevent others – young people temporarily overwhelmed by one class or another, personal disappointments and setbacks – from contemplating such dramatic and irreversible non-solutions. If this is the case, the Judge family acted commendably.

Rita Totten showed courage and sensitivity in covering this sad event. However, this kind of tragic story, especially, deserves very careful reporting, sensitive writing as well as an extra round or two of tough editing.

Pissed off family friend

Fri Oct 9 2009 10:15

Where is the respect for the this young man and his family! Details to this level are completly disrespectful!!!

Rita Totten should be demoted to reporting on grounds keeping events!!!

Where is the editor??? Honestly, you all shoudl be ashamed and embarassed.

Curious

Fri Oct 9 2009 10:01

So, basically, everyone and their dog hates this sentence: "Bonnie Judge said she found a bag over her brother’s head, but she thinks he took sleeping pills." Why not ask to cut that? Isn't that what we're really upset about? How much does the grammar actually apply to our outrage? Did we just equate our hate for insensitivity to our hate of 3rd grade writing skills? And the AUTHOR is INSENSITIVE? What are we?

Mary

Fri Oct 9 2009 05:36

To Nick's family - on behalf of the more compassionate student body here at the "U", we want you to know that we are sincerely sorry for your loss. Nick was a wonderful young man. He would literally do anything for anyone who asked. He will always be remembered as someone who made a positive impact on the lives he touched. He was caring, generous and someone with true integrity. He will be dearly missed. It is not important to us how he left us, he will always be remembered for what he brought into each of our lives. God bless you. He certainly blessed us by allowing each of us to know your son, and our friend, Nick.

John

Fri Oct 9 2009 05:24

The ' basics' in writing a story....who, what, when, where and why. NO WHERE does it say, HOW. A retraction of this story is in serious demand. It does not comply with the standard journalistic protocol of the Chronicle. Nick Judge was a private person. The 'freedom of the press' has definitely been abused and compromised in this article. There are rights to privacy guaranteed to everyone. Your invasion of them is a clear abuse of journalistic power and integrity. Seriously, rewrite the article. Keep in mind what the family had hoped to achieve by welcoming you into their lives in this most desperate hour.

Your name

Fri Oct 9 2009 04:04

Honestly, I think this is extremely offensive. I knew Nick, and I just recently lost a loved one to suicide, who was friends with Nick. The details of what happened did not need to be announced to the entire student body. If these types of details had been announced about the person I lost, I would be furious.

Your name

Thu Oct 8 2009 19:35

Agreed with Robert. The grammar of this article is that of a 3rd grader- if that. I have never seen so short of an article repeat their sources, over and over again. Even more sad- the writer is quoting someone who they did not even interview. The information really came from a third party source. Watch out Chronicle- I see a law suite in your future in regards to this situation! SHAME ON YOU! Shame on the writer and shame on whoever approved this article to go through. If I were you, I would print an apology to all of the friends and family of Nick, that the Chronicle has hurt by this article!. SHAME ON YOU, CHRONICLE! SHAME ON YOU!

Jenna

Thu Oct 8 2009 16:08

Any time someone decides that the life they have is not worth living any longer, it should be considered a tragedy and should be dealt with in the most delicate and caring way. The writer of this article has obviously never lost someone close to them and doesn't realize the impact such a piece would have on the survivors. Careless words...you'll never make a good writer if you can't, even for a moment, put yourself in the shoes of those you are writing about. Time for you to go back to the basics of journalism and submit a column truly addressing the concerns the family had wanted to bring to light...

Robert

Thu Oct 8 2009 15:37

Agreed, agreed, agreed. The article does NOT meet the end purpose that the family had wished for. However, whoever wrote the article obviously has a promising career with the National Enquirer. What happened to in-depth journalism? The grammar is that of a third grader...there is no need in a short article such as this to continual repeat for the sources or other parties first and last names. The elementary readings of "Dick and Jane" are written better - - - here's hoping the author seriously considers another profession! And, more importantly, here's hoping the author realizes how printed words can cut so deeply...

caption

so beside the point of me going to church I thought it would be fun for people to make up a caption for this picture (this is a real picture from today...)

suicide

I do things in the very spur of the moment so today when I read this
http://www.dailyutahchronicle.com/news/student-remembered-as-passionate-hard-working-1.1940500 I wanted to email the friend and ask her what the untold story was??? so I found her on facebook and I wrote this email... but I need to go through it before I send it to make sure my point is clear and that I'm not being a complete jerk... so yeah tell me what you think...

to start, I am so sorry about the loss of your friend.

I am curious though about somethings, I really don't know how to bring this up but I guess the reasons don't matter it's the fact that 2 people thought that suicide was the answer.

there has to be a reason behind it and I guess that is what bothers me. I think it should be brought to the open (I am not the one to do it nor would I even consider it). there is more to it then the quote from his dad implying that it was school.

so again I really don't know why I am writing to you, I guess I just want to know why you think he did it... since I am a complete stranger you can be honest with me for my sake or you can ignore this email altogether.

I guess the way I look at it is, suicide is the ultimate voluntary (to a degree) way to give up and move on. so it is a decision (to a degree) that the person made. to avoid others from doing the same thing you should confront the issue publicly even if it is hard... I say this because a relatively close friend of mine killed himself because he was gay. I knew this and I know his family knew this but for everyone else it was left to he struggled with depression and couldn't overcome it. So it is a disservice to all those who have the problem because they continue to suffer in silence.

It seems this could be the case because his friend killed himself 8 months ago and now here we are today. and so the world can learn from this even if it is one person, but either way I will move on and only remember this when I hear a story of someone who gave up.

as the world turns...

so where should this begin? Today was one of those mondays where it's just another day. I went to work and on my lunch one of my coworkers stopped me telling me a mutual coworker in another department was killed in a recreational accident. This guy was a really nice friendly guy. I feel cheated for his life (he had his shit together) and his small family. I knew him pretty well and he probably would of said damn I didn't expect that to happen... I don't know if this bothers me so much cause I see it happening to me. At the same time it's my curse to live this hell as some cruel punishment... so yeah reminiscing memories is a good thing but it also sucks. WTF... I guess life goes on... so heres to my life update more will come... school sucks that also isn't anything new...

I'm alive...

it's true, I made it back from my vacation alive... I won't go into too much detail but I figure I'm not going to be vague about it either because that is boring... (and I'm trying not to be paranoid about the whole anonymity thing...) I rode my motorcycle 8000 miles to the Arctic Ocean in Alaska... plus everything I will talk about I thought about for countless hours as I drove countless miles... so explanations are needed.

I think I just figured out what I'm mostly looking for. How do I move on with my life? Yeah I'm gay, yeah I was raised LDS, NOW WHAT??? SO I guess I'll work with that for now...

yikes

well a lot has happened, I keep thinking that I have grown a lot and won't be able to grow anymore but then I look back and see that I continue to grow... maybe learn is a better word? ANYWAY... I continue to figure out what my life is to me... I am going on a VERY VERY BIG TRIP soon and am SO EXCITED... from it I hope to find more direction and I hope that I will be able to trust myself and finish school and become somebody... I am a least starting to believe this. so life will continue on and I hope it continues in a good way... I know things will come up but I just hope I can deal with them more positively now... anyway if you want to know more about my trip let me know I'm not going to talk much about it but I do have a separate blog that I will track my journey...