this post is going to be very controversial sorry...
After 8 years I have finally came to a realization that I am still trying to comprehend/understand. It has to to with Bush, the war, peak oil, and whatever else the conspiracy/anti involves. The only problem is it makes sense and it adds up. I know that you can find a following of pretty much anything and it will always make sense if you want to believe it. I'm confused, I don't know what to think/believe.
I guess I will say hypothetically if it is "true," so what? Well then I'm a citizen of a corrupt, world dominating country, of which I am ashamed of. Do I move to Canada? No because it's too cold. Mexico? Ummm I wouldn't last very long... I "stay and fight"! but what does that involve? What if it is not true? Then I just keep living my life hoping the economy picks up and that I find a job that I will be able to help things move along.
I guess in either case the outcome is the same, something needs to be done regardless of the worlds current situation. I need to get involved and start paying attention to my surroundings and just hope that all hell doesn't break loose for a little while longer so I can enjoy using petroleum to make my motorcycle move 15,000 miles this year. (just to brag thats 300 gallons of gas and I'm willing to pay around 5 dollars a gallon totaling 1500 dollars for one AMAZING summer)
What my problem is, is what does it mean to get involved. The underlying problem as I see it has got out of control. The World/USA has so many bad habits it is impossible to do anything that will make a difference. I know I have a bad attitude but what do I have to work with? I hear all the talk that we need to do something because it is us (along with the future generations) that will have to live with the resulting problems. So the actual dumb asses that got us into this again cop out and spread the blame... They say that it is our generation that has to deal with it for our future generations to live. The damn generation that is passing all the blame is STILL ****ing us over so they can live their lives the way they are used to. Not only that but it is rubbing off on our generation too, its not enough that all our generation has to deal with it but most of them still have all the same bad habits that got us into this. Why do I even care about this hopeless situation? Why cant I live it up and just die like my previous generation? Why do I have to care? I just want to mind my own business and live my lame pointless existence the way I want, just like every other 6.7 billion human being on this earth. I can go on and on and on and on but where does that get us?
I guess like my first topic, so what? Either way this is how it is right? Fine. I'm not a leader, I don't know anything when it comes to making a difference. I don't like politics and again know nothing about them. I guess I'll be an "example" I'll live meagerly and recycle and reduce my consumption on the worlds resources while nothing changes. That's POINTLESS, action needs to be taken. The dumb ass previous generation needs to change and stop everything they're doing bad and start doing something good. Or give us, the generation that has to deal with this control. and not just keep saying oh it's your problem, it's our fault but it's your problem while they keep their destructive habits the same.
I think part of my problem is I have realized this for along time and that is why I am so negative and have this bad attitude toward most everything, why I have no passion about anything, basically why I'm a looser that is pretty much depressed and hates himself and his situation and everything around him, basically why I'm miserable. I epitomize the phrase generation X, that my prior generation gives people like me.
Thats the way it is. What do I do to change? What action do I act on? How do I change all I have ever been? I'm not outgoing around people I don't know. This doesn't make a good political leader.
I've suppressed my thoughts for years and have let people walk on me, it's basically all I know. How can I make a difference? Trivial, pointless, meaningless, waste makes up our news, it's the classic "elephant in the room" nobody wants to deal with it or knows how so it is just ignored. It's the same way in the church and the churches PR doesn't help anything... re: the recent Tom Hanks blip serious Monson you need to do something about whoever is running your PR because I hope someday you regret the things that have been put out into the world...
As you can see between the worlds problem and dealing with the church I am in a corner and cannot get out. I have been literally beaten by all aspects that should have been helping me become a contributing member of society and now I cower at my responsibilities. Is there any hope? Has my life been ruined? Can I overcome all this and make a difference? What will be the initial trigger that will start the uncontrollable force that wants to lash out and avenge my character in retaliation?