Wednesday, February 17, 2010


right so I have a few things in my head I need to talk about but this just happend and I don't know if I should just drop it or make a bigger deal then I already have... this is my cousin we're not close and obviously his friends are dumb asses so do I call out their ignorance on my cousins FB or what? oh and I'm not out to my cousin but don't care anymore so that wouldn't play a part in it...
(forgive the ghetto quick and dirty editing...)


ControllerOne said...

Idiots usually become bigger idiots when you point out their idiocy. So, I'd leave it alone.

Good to be Free said...

I second controllerone, it isn't worth your effort or concern.

Scott said...

I was in Sarah's classroom yesterday for a few minutes (had to get some papers signed for a refinance). One of her students was asking if she had another copy of a paper that she sometimes hands out. It says something like:

"I just heard you say 'gay'. I think you meant something like: stupid, absurd, [etc...]"

... turns out this student and another student loved having a list of put-downs that they would never have thought to use otherwise. :-D

But the fact that she doesn't tolerate the word "gay" as a pejorative does seem to make something of a difference.

Some people use the word because they're genuinely homophobic and really think that calling someone or something "gay" is a major insult. But a lot of people use it just because it's become somewhat normal to do so, and wouldn't if they stopped and thought and realized that it's offensive to some people.

I don't know what kind of people the commenters in this Facebook thread are, so it might or might not make any difference to them for you to say anything. But even if it doesn't change the way they think or act, it might make someone else who's reading stop and think before they call someone/something "gay".

me said...

I agree completely with Scott's comments. And, I applaud Sarah's efforts to keep people from using "gay" in slanderous forms.

I, like Sarah, also teach. I had a student (7th grade) who kept calling people gay, as if he was trying to insult the socks off of them. The first time, I mentioned it to him that I would prefer he not use the word in those tones. The next time he did it, I visited personally with him in the hall, telling him he did not know who might be gay around him (including his teacher) and that they could be very hurt or insulted by what he was saying. I thought this did the trick, but AGAIN, heard him being slanderous.

This time when I talked with him in the hall, privately, I said, "So. You have African American blood in you, right?" He nodded his head yes. I said, "How would YOU feel if, when people got frutrated with you or with others, they said, "Oh, that is SO black!"

His eyes about popped out of his head and he said, "I would HATE that!" And, I said, "Exactly. That is how people who are gay might feel about how you use the word 'gay'". He told me he FINALLY got it, what I had been trying to tell him in our little chats and that he would never do this again.

I had hom for the rest of that school year, and then the next school year, also, and he never repeated his slanders.

Cadence said...

so thanks for the advice,
I'm gonna go with the first advice for now, I don't really know my cousin and I don't know his friends I know they're the type that wouldn't be affected by this at all... saying that I agree with the other advice and believe that someone would benefit from it even someone who is gay and completely closeted would find strength in it... so I commit that in a different situation where I have more control to call people out on it, like my own FB... anyway thanks for making me think...